“Tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow,
Creeps in this petty pace from day to day
To the last syllable of recorded time,
And all our yesterdays have lighted fools
The way to dusty death. Out, out, brief candle!
Life’s but a walking shadow, a poor player
That struts and frets his hour upon the stage
And then is heard no more: it is a tale
Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury,
I’m not having an existential crisis per say, because that would be very boring and contrived.
It’s better than a mid-wife crisis, I suppose.
Instead, I feel hopeful yet a bit wary.
This lingered in my thoughts for a few days. It just strikes a chord within me, as one who does believe in reincarnation. It says “At the seemingly inevitable end of time and the Universe as Humanity currently knows them- Are all of our efforts worth it in the end if they will be forgotten to the ravages of time?”
It’s easy to say that none of it really matters, if time creates and destroys all of our efforts. Still, I maintain that there is something beautiful, precious, and special about consciousness. Something that we just don’t get right yet. We, as in humanity. What I see could be disheartening for some… We think that if we don’t live on in some manner, that we will be forgotten. That all will be lost. I don’t believe that. I believe that the experience of existing and attempting to thrive within the challenging environment of the earthly/material plane is something that we have no choice in. We’re given a great amount of consciousness, intelligence, capacity to be creative… to think abstractly… to try new things… a fascination with novelty… a bit of divine goodness if we seek it… We’ve got a lot of tools to make each life the best we can. They’re not always good or perfect. Some lifetimes are wrought with pain and suffering. Bad as they are, I think we need those experiences. How can we strive for better if all we know is sunshine and sparkle ponies?
I feel we’re here to strive for better. To learn. To grow. For Humanity to get over its destructive tendencies and learn from those mistakes.
We have so much more potential, and so much farther to go.
I believe in us. With each lifetime, I hope that I learn something that will carry me into the eventual next.
It seems that we’re living in a very dark time. Have you noticed? I’ve tried not to, but the odds are not in our favor at present. We’re learning though. Some pretty bad shit is going to roll downhill before we pull our heads out of our asses. Quantum physics is a step in the right direction. We don’t understand all that is possible yet, but we’re making strides.
We’re so fixated on the earthly realm, that it’s hard to look beyond into something that you can’t imagine, conceive of, measure, prove or quantify.
Humanity has a way of missing the point sometimes. No need to argue about who’s religion is more right. I feel that we all have a choice. If you want to experience the Divine and get a glimpse of what is possible, it’s there for you in a myriad of ways. It’s likely that one will pierce through the veil, and you’ll get what you seek.
There are plenty of ways to do this, and since humans are so plucky and curious, they’ve made a lot of progress.
There are also just as many ways to ignore it, and go on living your current earthly life as best you can. Either way, you have a choice. No one way is right, and I will not back down on that point. That doesn’t mean that some ways of doing so aren’t a bit harmful and destructive, i.e. destructive cults, religious wars. etc.
I don’t believe in anything but possibilities. We know a little bit about the Material Plane and the laws that govern it. We understand Nature to a degree. We’re just beginning to comprehend Time and the Universe. We have a sense of the Divine, but lack a clear and consistent connection.
We don’t know much, but we can go a long ways with what we’ve learned so far.
The macrocosm in this? Humanity as a whole. The microcosm? Each one of us as we complete another go-round on the big ol’ wheel.
Fate? We have a sense that it’s guiding us at times, but none of us really know what it means.
So we live. We keep trying. Even though our efforts may one day be erased by the ravages of time, I don’t feel it’s all for naught. I think that people who are focused on the after-life are in some instances afraid of being forgotten. Afraid of no longer existing. If that’s not an existential crisis, I don’t know what is. So we believe what makes the most sense. We believe what comforts us, and somehow make the challenges of this life bearable. It’s hard to think we struggle for no reason. I’m not afraid of being forgotten. I don’t believe in an after-life. I don’t believe in karma either, when it comes to rebirth. I believe that the wheel keeps turning. If you have more to learn, you’re best to get back on that horse. If you’ve gone as far as you can go, there must be something else to do. Maybe you come home? Maybe you become part of the Collective Unconscious? Your guess is as good as mine. I’d like to think that there is something to all of it, and we just don’t know it yet.
I don’t have time for it though. I doubt that you do either.
I’ll take the lessons I’ve learned in past lives (I know of a few), and try to make this life the best one I can. This body of mine and it’s genetic make-up comes with a set of challenges, as does the time, place, family, and society I was born into. We’re all equal in that we don’t choose the raw material that we’re given to work with. Some materials respond better to certain techniques, and most of that we learn through experience. For example, I didn’t choose to have a life riddled with chronic pain, but I can choose how I deal with it. Yet we have choices in life. We can work with what we have in the best way we can. There are things to enjoy and savor… The Material Plane is full of glorious sensory stimuli and pleasurable experiences. We do what we can with what we’re given. More often than not, that in itself is a lesson learned. In my case, the chronic pain has led to me discovering that my pain medicine of choice works as a mildly pleasant entheogen for me. That was unexpected, and has led me down a very different path. We’re empowered with choices in this life, if all goes well. When there are no choices, Fate has intervened. Sometimes that is for the best, sometimes not.
I’m content to see what I can do with this life. What awaits Humanity is not a problem I preoccupy myself with. All I can do is make the best choices I can in my current phase, with some mindfulness towards the future. I can’t control it, but I can do small things that may have an impact. I don’t know what stupid shit Humanity is going to do next. I don’t know how this will impact my future go-rounds, assuming that I’ll have more. I assume I will- I mean, I’m far from perfect in any way. This life is full of possibilities still, and I embrace that… Microcosm! I have faith in Humanity’s ability to overcome and strive towards all that is possible… Macrocosm!
So, Humanity… Keep on’ keepin’ on. Nolite te bastardes carborundorum! You’ve come a long way, baby… Yet the Kali Yuga is far from over.
But I believe in you. I am no one of importance, and it makes no difference in the Macrocosm. But Humanity, I believe in you just the same.
It’s not all for naught. The Universe is mysterious and extraordinary. As you unravel Her Mysteries, I hope I can have a seat somewhere on the sidelines, if Fate allows.
In the Material Realm, we’re sometimes unfortunately bound by Fate, Time, Matter. I won’t live to see it in this go-round, and I know not if I’ll get another. I’d like to though. It’s one thing to see the patterns, but it’s another to unravel them, reveal them, reverse engineer them, twist them, understanding them completely. I can’t help but be a little bit curious, and you can hardly blame me.
We have the tools and raw retard-strength to keep on as we are. For a while. I know many fear the future. We’re starting to see that we haven’t been especially nice to our planet, our resources, or each other. The world seems to be a much more volatile place than when I came of age at the end of the Cold War. The stakes are higher than they’ve ever been. I hope we don’t have too suffer too much to learn that which remains illusive to us, yet I’m not fully convinced.
Whatever it all means, I maintain that it must mean something. I’m just a casual mystic and bad ascetic. What the hell do I know other than that the fact that I know there is hope for us all?
Humanity i love you
because you would rather black the boots of
success than enquire whose soul dangles from his
watch-chain which would be embarrassing for both
parties and because you
unflinchingly applaud all
songs containing the words country home and
mother when sung at the old howard
Humanity i love you because
when you’re hard up you pawn your
intelligence to buy a drink and when
you’re flush pride keeps
you from the pawn shops and
because you are continually committing
nuisances but more
especially in your own house
Humanity i love you because you
are perpetually putting the secret of
life in your pants and forgetting
it’s there and sitting down
and because you are
forever making poems in the lap
of death Humanity
i hate you
— e.e. cummings
Humanity- I do love you… You’re a scrappy upstart with a fighting chance… Go Team HUMANS!
Consciousness and Creativity- I’m glad we’ve got you on our side. We wouldn’t have come this far without you. You’re the reason any of this is possible for us.
Nature- I’m sorry we haven’t been very kind towards you. We’re learning. We can do better, and we will do better.
The Divine- Thank you for giving us the opportunity to work with you. It really does help.
The Universe/Space- Thank you for giving us the luxury of our Conditions. We wouldn’t be here if not for you setting the stage for us- whether purposefully or not.
Fate- I accept that you are what you are and that you have a job to do. I accept that I can’t always change things, no matter how much it hurts not to.
Time- You know we will eventually control you, right? Theoretically, we’re starting to understand you better. It’s only a matter of… well… Do I have to say it?
The Collective Unconscious- Thank you for taking the strange bits and pieces of information, archetypes, and thoughtforms and giving Human Consciousness something to refer back to. You’re like the Wikipedia of Consciousness! Sure you could be more accessible, but we’ll take what we can get.
Conditions- Man… you really make shit tough on us sometimes. Bad weather, electromagnetic storms, asteroids careening towards Earth? Sure, we can’t always change or control you, but we’re getting better at it. The ability to adapt to and even change conditions are part of what makes Humanity so unique. Don’t think that you have the upper-hand, Conditions. We might have a surprise or two in store for you.
The Mysteries-Thank you for giving us a little taste of what is possible, just to keep us curious. If we didn’t have the Mysteries, we wouldn’t keep asking the questions that will get us closer to the answers. We want to know more… and because the Mysteries exist, we keep trying.
What Lies Beyond Our Universe/Comprehension That We’re Pretty Fucking Far Away from Understanding Any Time Soon- Yo. Whassup? If you’re ever in town, I’d love to buy you a beer.
I know nothing. I only see what I see. I could be wrong, but I could also be right. Either way…
I am grateful for this life and the ability to see. It’s served me well, and I am better off for it.
We all play a part in how this turns out… All you can do is continue to live, and live as best as you can despite the Conditions.
The Possibilities are endless.
p.s. No, I’m not high right now. Seriously, I’m not. Kind of sounds like I am, but being as there are a decided lack of dick jokes, you can rest assured that Madame Eris Quixotrix Hilton is 100% in the rightest and most rational mind that a crazy Erisian lady can be, which is really kind of scary if you think about it. Namaste-yay-yay, mothahfucka!