The Dating Game Spread

The Dating Game Spread


I’ve had a bit of a lull lately when it comes to tarot, but there is a lot going on in the MunDanish part of my world. Things have not calmed down, but I’ve calmed down. This is good. Good is good. I had a good bit of success with a reading I did last night for my sister, and thought that the spread that resulted yielded good enough results to share. My younger sister is a single mom, who takes a fairly casual approach to dating. She’s really not ready to get into something serious with someone, unles she’s sure there is good potential there for the longterm. She keeps things fun and light-hearted, but decidedly non-comitted and not at all serious. Unfortunately for her, her ambivalence towards commitment and casual approach drives guys wild. At this point in time, she’s got more interested parties than she can handle. Fortunately for her, tarot knows what she already knows and was only too glad to tell her.

I developed a good spread for this, and we got some interesting results. I’m calling it The Dating Game spread. I think you could easily use it for dating or any kind of social setting with more than one party involved. You do a small spread for each person you’re curious about. For my sister’s gang of dating fools, we did three. Bachelor #1, Bachelor #2, and Bachelor #3. I only knew a little bit about Bachelor #1 before doing the spread.

1: Love Interest’s Dominant Personality Traits or Concerns At This Time
2-3: How the two of you interact together
4-5: The Outcome of the Relationship if Present Course of Action Continues
6 (Optional): What You Can Do To Change It or Reinforce It

Bachelor #1
1. Personality: The Magician. This is pretty amusing. He’s an attorney. A slick-talking smartass with uber-amounts of infectious charisma who can talk his way in and out of anything. He’s quite charming and quite attractive, but he’s above all a man of action. Sis has a blast hanging out with this guy, but is beginning to think that fun is all is.

2. Interaction: The Knight of Swords, The Princess of Cups, Justice This guy is sooooooo K of Swords. Very intelligent. Almost too much so for my sister’s liking. She’s smart enough, but has little… shall we say… intellectual curiosity. He challenges her a bit too much, and intimidates her a bit as well. He’s quite brilliant, and is very well-read, worldly and educated. Still, their verbal tête-à-têtes and friendly sarcastic sparring matches are a lot of fun for both of them. They are both intensely competitive, and loooooooove to debate over who is more right. Hellloooooo Justice! Can I get a witness? They actually have conversations, which is new for her. Interesting ones. He’s a very challenging and swordy man, but it’s not at all a bad thing. But… he’s not very emotionally connected. That’s where the Princess of Cups comes in. He’s missing that tiny bit of empathy and heart that I do think she needs. The spark isn’t there romantically, although on most other levels they are quite the match. Perhaps it would be more so if homegirl bothered to pick up a book every now and again…

3. Outcome: 10 of Cups, 5 of Wands We both agreed that their relationship is most likely best as friends. They enjoy their little spars and spats over ideals and convictions. They enjoy one another’s company. I see them both happiest in a friendship as they have now.

Bachelor #2
1. Personality: Three of Cups, 6 of Cups I didn’t know anything about this guy. Just his name. The first thing I asked her was “Is he stuck in college party mode or something? It looks like he is kind of immature and drinks too much. He’s not very serious is he?” DING-DING-DING-DING! We have a winner. She likes the guy, but feels that someone his age should be thinking about other priorities. He’s 35. Too old to have a kegerator be the centerpiece of his home.

2. Interaction: Four of Pents, 8 of Swords, 8 of Wands I read this as he’s a bit guarded and stand-offish, and that he is really hard to read. I also asked her if her recent interaction with him had come as a suprise or out of nowhere. She reminded me that she’d dated him briefly before, but had indeed begun talking again after a random out of the blue text message. Yep. 8 of Wands gettin’ it done! He is a bit stingy with his time and affections, rather than his money. The 4 of Pents fits here. She’s found herself confused by his motivations, and it’s been frustrating for her in the past. He seems to have changed, but we both fear she could be right back in 8 of Swords Land, confused as ever.

3. Outcome: The Empress, The Lovers, Three of Swords As I see it, he’s not going to change his ways until he becomes a parent. Usually I don’t think the Empress always equals KIDS or Fertility, but it really seemed to resonate strongly. He’s not an adult yet, and that might be the only thing to get him there. Yet… does he want that? Does she want that with him? No. It all comes down to her making a decision. Are the good things about him enough to outweigh the crappy ones? I think if she were to maintain an interest, it would only end in heartbreak. She doesn’t need that.

Bachelor #3
1. Personality: The Moon This was interesting… She’s actually got a blind date with the a guy on Saturday. She knows a little bit about him. He’s a nice, respectful, hardworking, good ol’ boy, genuine cowboy type. Sure, she likes Unfrozen Magic Lawyer, but Cowboy seems right up her alley. From what she’s heard. Which is just image. I’d see the moon as playing up the bits and pieces she knows about him thus far, that create an image. We really don’t know anything about him. He’s still a bit of a mystery. We’re not really meant to know much past the illusion at this point. And… it was a full moon yesterday too. SPOOKITY!!!!

2. Interaction: The High Priestess, Ace of Cups, 6 of Pents We don’t get to know much about this guy yet… HP is doing her thing, and along with the Moon? We will have to wait and see. However, I do see that there is some romantic potential here. Ace of Cups? I don’t see it in the two other guys. There is a spark here. The start of something. I believe it might take a bit of balancing on her part. She’s got some issues with control, and I think with this guy she might have to be willing to give and take a bit to see things as they are, and not how she perceives them. She is stubborn as a mule, but I think she might have to soften that a bit to get to know him. For some reason, I see him as a stablilizing force. Not controlling, but assured. Masculine. She’d do well with someone like this. She will allow herself to open up and share with him, and let him in if she wants to get to know him. The HP is just as much about the guarded parts that she won’t let be known about herself, as well as what is unknown about him.

3. Outcome: Judgement, The Emperor, The Star, 7 of Cups Yep. The Emperor comes to play! He’s the kind of man that you settle down with. The others are guys that you have fun with. He’s at a point in his life where he’s definitely stable and ready to act like a man and not an overgrown fratard. Still, she won’t see it at first. I am thinking a moment of clarity will come, and she’ll realize what is there. It will change everything for the best. Maybe she’ll get over commitmenophobia? I don’t know why… What we don’t know about this guy is huge. But what I do see… I believe it’s what she needs. 7 of Pents tells me that she is not going to expect it at first, but it’s there none the less. She’ll have to do some work on herself. The Star? It’s quite promising. We’ll see what happens, but… I think she needs to go on this date, and see what the Moony/Priestessy fuss is all about!

We shall see what happens… If I am right, she owes me a cup of coffee. This spread was a good way to lay it all out visually, and see who we’re dealing with. I’d definitely use it again.

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