It’s been my tradition for a few years to pick a card for the year, right around new years. Understandably, it makes me a little bit nervous at times. What if I pull the Tower? Or Death? Both usually indicate a tumultuous year. Last year, I pulled The Star. As it turns out, le tarot definitely made the right call. While it’s been a rather difficult year for me on some levels, it’s brought a lot of subtle yet unexpected shining moments. It’s been a year of looming darkness, punctuated with hope and healing. Over the course of 2009, every time things seemed to hang from the ledge of despair, there was always a sudden turn around. A change of luck. A sea change. Things didn’t change in a great and flashy spin of The Wheel. For me, the Wheel is usually tricky and not typically a good omen. Whatever was needed to get things back on track, whether with my job, my husband’s job, our finances, our home, my family, my relationships, it materialized eventually. Things resolved themselves, and a beacon of hope set the stage. While I’m no fan of the darker times, it was a relief to know that things weren’t permanent and that plenty of help was on the way. I’ve never had a Star year before, so I can look back on it now, knowing that the challenges were certainly worth the effort. The year before, I pulled the High Priestess. That was a watershed year for me, as far as spirituality and self-reflection. I turned within, and busted through some barriers. I’m still navagating through the wreckage on that one, two years later. Ugh… I was brutal. Here be sea monster-beasties!
This year, I’ve pulled The Empress. This is interesting. I haven’t pulled the Empress in many years. It could mean a number of things. The first, quickest, dirtiest answer? Babyville. To which I reply… FUCK NO! I don’t want kids. My husband doesn’t want kids. If we were to have a kid, it would not be good. Let’s just hope that Madame Empress rearing her golden-tressed head doesn’t have any such thoughts rattling around up there. It’s not gonna happen, Mamacita! No! No! NO!
I’m also thinking that it may be a year dominated by creative works. That’s usually how she shows up in my House of Cards. When I was in design school she showed up quite frequently, a muse in need of Adderal, giggling and dancing through my creative process. She brought those delicious little snaps and pops of idea-sauce that led to some of my most meaningful and inspired projects. For me, the Empress is all about shouting "EUREKA!" at the top of my lungs. I’ve been a bit bogged down over the last few years, and haven’t really been working on much of anything. I don’t get very far on any of my novel ideas. I seldom feel the burning need to CREATE SOMETHING that used to be quite a familiar friend. It’s been a whole lot of "meh", with little or no impetus to move things along, or even get started. Perhaps I’ll be going back to that in some way. Building, creating, and shaping those twisty little idea nuggets into something very cool. When I am more spiritually focused, anything creative that I might have going on utterly dies on the vine.I feel good about the next year, if it has a return to my creative roots. I’ve been in a rut, and I could certainly use a little push. Just being who I am, there isn’t any part of my life that isn’t infused with just a bit of creative flair. I have a very non-creative job, but I push the envelope in regards to how creative I can be within it’s restraints.
Will we buy a house, paint and redecorate? Empress LOOOOOVES that shit! Will I actually sit down and work on one of my novels? AWWWWWWW YEAH! Will I slowly begin to take on more design work? Maybe. Will I make stuff? Quite possibly. For me, the Empress builds, creates, and nurtures ideas. She gives them a safe haven, a refuge, a place to rest while they prepare to jaunt out into the tangible real world of the Emporer. She is not the final product, she is the process. Perhaps there will be an element of building up towards, or preparing for something. If I feel good as I go through the process, I will have a more successful outcome. Perhaps we’ll be getting ready for buying a house?
I may flip over a clarifiyer, just for fun… Just to know where to focus… and…
6 of Wands… I mean… 6 of WIN!
There it is again! Well… I suppose I’m on the right track.